Intro

see my webinar from last year to help you find tools to develop a life you desire -see below for further info about the ideas behind personal and self development

Welcome to the this part of my website where you can begin to think about the journey you are on, what you want ,where you’re at and the changes you want to make in your life.

 

If you are new to thinking about your health and wellbeing , or you have been on the journey a while and would like to explore further what else you can bring into your life that enables you to feel happier and live life with more passion and vitality then start here. The website is aimed at introducing people to the many different ways you can improve your well-being.

 

There is no one right path, unless you have an immediate health concern, then the starting point is to visit your doctor. Otherwise the ideas below are to get you thinking about what might work for you , understand where you are now on life’s journey and consider what you want.

 

Below is a way to use coaching tools to start to explore life and its different facets on a deeper level. It can be through honest introspection that helps you consider what is , and where you can make some changes, small or large.

 

First take a pen and draw some straight lines across the page then number them , 0-10  each line represents a different are of your life. This is a process many coaches use to help you break down those various areas and consider how satisfied you are in each of them. Every area of our lives influences another. If you have a physical issue , this in turn affects your mental health performance at work and can create issues within relationships. This also means changing and improving one area of your life can also improve other areas
Draw a line like the ones below.
0———1———-2———–3———–4————5————6———-7——–8———–9———-10 work
0———1———-2———–3———–4————5————6———-7——–8———–9———-10 money
0———1———-2———–3———–4————5————6———-7——–8———–9———-10 Relationships
0———1———-2———–3———–4————5————6———-7——–8———–9———-10 health and wellbeing
and so on. you can also add religious/spiritual, love, hobbies, rest and relaxation.
Relationships can mean friends or partners.
The key thing is to ask first how satisfied am i with ……………and then log your very first response. don’t question it , but instead log the response and do the same on the other areas.
for e.g Health and Well-being is 3. what makes it a three and what number would you like to be
  • what would improve that for you ? what’s stopping you (this is where you get to consider any resistance or blocks to moving forward)
  • So again ponder, wonder what you want , is it to improve how you look, feel or is it a health issue that isn’t going away ?
  • If its relationships, what is stopping you feel satisfied in them, what could be different. What does your heart tell you .
  • But for now choose one area and dive in deeper
  • If its health and wellbeing then ask where you are right now.
Do you need to do more movement (walking , stretching, cycling, yoga, gardening) How much are you moving.
Track your day . are you sitting at a desk all day?. Do you get up every hour for a walk and stretch. if you commute to work chance are you are getting in a few thousand steps, therefore your starting point is different .
If you do little movement then you have to start each day adding some time. even if its ten minutes, those ten minutes add up over the week and help you slowly build up on what your doing.

 

If you commute and walk a few those and steps you might need more stretching, as aches and pains can be caused by standing to long or tight muscles.

 

If you already have that in place maybe you now want to increase your fitness and need to get your heart beating faster a few times a week, which is where cycling, swimming , walking faster or uphill will get you those results.
The key point is you have to start near where  you are at to prevent exhaustion or injury. especially if you haven’t done much in a while.
After my car accident , i started with ten minutes stretching in the morning , then joined a yoga class once a week and did that for a few months , then I did two classes . As i was going into work a few times a week and going by train I started to also add in the steps i was doing. But I couldn’t push it too far as too much meant muscles would go tight and spasm at times. However, now that many of us are working at home, we have lost those extra steps we would accumulate therefore I have now had to add more into my morning or evening walks.
If you apply the same approach to other areas of your life and consider whats going on , how long has it felt this way, what have you tried? do you need some help from a therapist to work out what you need and want or do you need to do some new hobbies to meet like minded people that you can forge some new friendships with?
When were not sure , what helps is to either talk it through with another or to try meditation and journaling. Once we shift out of our analytical mind that throws up scenario after scenario we can tune in deeper to ourselves allowing new information previously not heard to come forward .
NB if you find you mood is consistently low or you have alot of anxiety then do find a clinical practitioner that can help you learn some technique’s to reduce or eradicate these symptoms.

 

Journaling 

 

Step one– The value of journaling -take out a pen and a nice new plain paper book and start to journal. Write what flows from your mind, Just write, don’t try and get it right, or defined just write.

 

Sometimes writing down your ideas, feelings, frustrations, or what went well, things that make you feel good and what you are grateful for, can help you ground them and free yourself from the every increasing level of introspection or critically looking at everything .. Introspection  can be helpful, but over time to much thinking and feeding of negative stories, thoughts and ideas can just bring you down even more. However when we journal it has a really good way of releasing those ideas and thoughts, rather than ignore them until they next creep up again. You can also start to explore what feels good, what moments had a positive impact , over the course of the days and weeks especially when you re read what you wrote, you can start to see the highs and lows of your mind and the impact that those thoughts have.

 

Over time you can begin to see what happens when you clear what is interfering in your mid and instead now focus on what feels good, lifts your mood and makes a difference to your day. Its one step at a time and over time the consistency of doing this can really have an impact. 

 

Now after a few days or weeks write mindfully, Notice what other feelings thoughts and ideas emerge .Over the weeks notice if anything changes, Does your mood lift, do you get irritated? do you enjoy the process?
Then sit still and ask yourself what you now need. ideas of a new thing to try a book to buy or a friend to call may emerge. Just sit and breath. breath through any discomfort and enjoy the stillness. Don’t set a target that feels unachievable, maybe start with 5 minutes a day.
As I entered a new decade, surpassing my 40s and now entering my 50s. I entered it with wonder, hope and inspiration, along with a passion to evolve not just my interests photography but also find new discovery’s that would enable me to feel a sense of satisfaction with life. It was through journaling and logging many moments that I started to see a shift in the way life was unfolding.
 I started to travel more from about 2014 and by 2016 bought myself a new camera and took it everywhere I went. It was the beginning of trying and testing out new ideas. to see how they felt and if i wanted to do more or try something else instead.
I also wanted to equally inspire friends, colleagues and clients to also do the same-tap into their deepest nature and passions.
I noticed where my ideas grew, the things that affected my mood, the days I needed to stay home and relax and others where I needed to get out and walk ,cycle or travel further afield. Over time I started to see what ideas were forming as a result of sitting down each day , to breath relax ad write down things that came to me.
 I started to wonder what things also helped people ignite their ideas, passions ,sense of wonder and a desire to feel good about life.
Its different for everyone. Some people find meaning in their families or the work they do, so look for change while others feel hopeless and dissatisfied. Wherever you are on your journey , write down how you feel , gauge it then decide that you will start to explore what might also work for you .
Like anything we can give some things ago and then slump back in our chair waiting for motivation to occur. If you are here , lacking or waiting for motivation then please read Mel Robbins book the 5 second rule. She goes into this issue deeply and her book has helped thousands of people.
With the outbreak of Covid here and then with lockdown in March 2020
Matters of mental health and wellbeing came up more strongly again, in my work and personal life.
I got out as much as possible, with my camera and started to find ways to enjoy the sense of freedom
For some, exploring all these facets of your life can be profound and lead to new ways of living you might never of thought of as possible…..
Sometimes it’s time to change or even transition, find new ways of being, move house ,find a new place to work and develop new friendships and hobbies.
Sometimes those things are through decisions we make and sometimes they are forced upon us.

 

                                                 2020 was the mark of many changes taking place totally outside of our control

 

Journaling observations
Through each step I was noticing the impact that Covid was having on those close to me, people at work and in my community. Initially, I found it almost impossible to write and find anything to take a photo of.
The Impact -for a short time ,It felt as if all inspiration had been crumpled. However, I knew this is what happens sometimes when we move into shock and fear. Anxiety can be paralysing and we need to process all that occurs. Silence stillness and utilising every skill becomes a necessary function.

 

For many of us we live life with little reflection on the way we carry out our roles, responsibility’s and interact with the people around us and when we  slow right down and bear witness to each of these small steps, navigating both our internal and external worlds we can start to clear what’s no longer needed and illicit a deeply powerful and often profound process. 
We live in constant process of change 

 

In the past I have also written about sometimes change needs to happen, but we ignore the signs. The something happens and it feels as if the changes are forced on us and we in turn are forced to move into action and consider things such as, don’t like our jobs, or where we live, have outgrown the friendships or the things we do. Sometimes the changes are just necessary
Sometimes however, we just don’t know what it is that we need to do next. We can leave the things we don’t want yet to feel really unclear about what we do want.
But for many as the news showed signs that things were getting alarming, fear and anxiety was ignited, and they needed to find whatever they could to manage this new and unexpected situation.

 

Step 2

 

Write about the way 2020 affected you, your friends and family. what did you start to do or see differently. Did it evoke a deep fear and anxiety or increase a desire to create a spiritual practice? What came that you didn’t expect but felt good What small things did you start to appreciate?

 

Sometimes we also have to apply The Breaks 

 

So, before we can do anything else, we tap into our innate survival mechanisms and do what we need to protect our families and livelihoods, whilst managing all that this has evoked.
This website was born from an innate desire to share with others some of the basics to feeling good. Finding what helps your health happiness and wellbeing. It’s a small portion of many of the things that can do just that. therefore, please see this website as a page that can introduce you to something you may have not heard of before or tried.

 

Now more than ever we have a need to reflect on where we are now, what we can do to lessen the fear anxiety and continue to not just survive but thrive.

 

My posts are aimed at that, interjected at times with those darker experiences along with some of the research or psychology behind them. take what appeals right now, knowing your mental health and wellbeing is the most important thing to maintain as well as the methods you need to deploy to have the finance you need to have the things that are important to you.

 

If overwhelmed or in shock we have to apply the breaks, rest, talk to someone and also make sure were eating and drinking enough.

 

If your not in a crisis then hold off from big decisions

 

While change is happening …..
Create the desired future…Once you have spent some time re grouping , and getting back to a place of feeling ok then start to consider what your best life would look like, where are you, who is in it, who isn’t, do you have a pet, have you changed your job, are you working for yourself, have you created a family, are you fit, happy and then allow yourself to really feel those things . immerse yourself in those feelings and then write down what pictures or ideas came to you. it doesn’t matter how you will get there or whether you can currently afford to do so, this is about creatine a start of generating what you want to feel. Most of what we want is a feeling. How do you want to feel more of the time?

 

In the process we can be presented with a whole host of thoughts and feelings that lure us back into the known ,no matter how outdated it is for our Soul. Our brain likes to take us back to those safe and known places, no matter how damaging that can be.  But if our Soul and life is calling us into action, we will only be able to ignore it for so long, as I also discovered.

 

It can be difficult to re-evaluate life, while sat on the same sofa with the same things calling your attention.

 

Now consider what you want to read and do and make one small step towards action.

 

Then read  Introduction To Wellbeing- Your RoadMap – Melanie Gabbi

 

If you want to learn more about your thoughts affect your life and reality then please visit The Law Of Attraction – For Beginners – Melanie Gabbi

 

Other films that make you look at how we can shape our lives  What the Bleep Do We Know? Full 2004 theatrical release. Quantum Physics – YouTube

 

If you want to find ways to improve your fitness through Yoga please go on DailyOM  they have some great starter courses that are really well priced.

 

A great interview on the brain, how we function and how we can harness its power see Change Your Brain: Neuroscientist Dr. Andrew Huberman | Rich Roll Podcast – YouTube