Over the past few months, I’ve found myself drawn back to listening to Mai Sol on YouTube. While he reads tarot cards, what keeps me listening isn’t really the cards themselves. It’s the way he weaves together philosophy, psychology, symbolism, and the subtle themes he feels are emerging collectively. He gives language to experiences that can otherwise feel difficult to describe.

Whether you resonate with tarot or not almost becomes irrelevant. What I value is the invitation to pause and reflect.

As someone who has spent over twenty‑five years working in mental health, alongside exploring spirituality, philosophy, yoga, and the many ways human beings seek meaning, I’ve come to appreciate that insight can arrive through unexpected doorways. Sometimes it comes through therapy. Sometimes through conversations with friends. Sometimes while sitting quietly on a beach watching the tide come in. And sometimes, it arrives through listening to someone articulate a feeling you’ve struggled to put into words.

Recently, Mai Sol spoke about themes of harmonisation, identity shifts, self‑acceptance, and the sense that many people are grieving old versions of themselves while simultaneously feeling called towards something new. As I listened, I found myself reflecting on my own journey through burnout, career changes, motherhood, loss, travel, and the ongoing process of becoming.

What struck me most was that beneath the spiritual language were some very human experiences that I suspect many of us are navigating right now.

Perhaps we aren’t having a crisis. Perhaps we’re finally having a conversation with ourselves that we’ve postponed for far too long.

A quiet whisper asking:

• Who am I now?

• What matters to me at this stage of my life?

• What parts of myself have I neglected in the pursuit of being who I thought I had to be?

• And what might become possible if I gave myself permission to evolve?

As I reflected on his words, I realised how closely they aligned with the themes running through the Devon Diaries, the Kent Diaries, my Soul‑Led Life writings, and the countless conversations I’ve had with clients over the years.

Because whether we call it identity development, post‑traumatic growth, midlife transition, spiritual awakening, or simply becoming more ourselves, something significant seems to be happening for many people.

We are questioning old narratives. We are loosening rigid identities. We are grieving versions of ourselves that got us this far. And perhaps, most importantly, we are beginning to trust the quiet nudges that suggest there may be another way to live.

1. Identity Is Becoming More Fluid

Many people are realising they no longer fit neatly into the identities they once held:

• “I’m the responsible one.”

• “I have to stay in this role.”

• “I’ve always been the strong one.”

• “I can’t change now.”

But something softer is emerging:

• What if I have changed?

• What if I want different things?

• What if I’m allowed to evolve?

This mirrors themes I’ve written about for years:

Too working‑class for one room, too middle‑class for another. Therapist and spiritual seeker. Professional and wanderer. Teacher and student. Strong woman and vulnerable woman.

Identity isn’t fixed. It moves. It breathes. It expands.

2. Many People Are Grieving Old Versions of Themselves

This grief is subtle because nothing tangible has necessarily been lost. The house still stands. The job still exists. The relationship is still there. And yet, internally, something no longer fits.

The old map stops working.

For many, the past decade has brought:

• burnout

• divorce

• redundancy

• menopause

• illness

• empty nests

• caring responsibilities

• loss of certainty

And perhaps the sadness isn’t because we failed.

Perhaps it’s because we are saying goodbye to versions of ourselves that got us this far.

3. The “Niggling Feeling” Deserves Attention

It’s not panic. Not urgency. Just a quiet knowing:

“There’s something more.” “I want to explore this.” “I think there’s another way.”

These nudges often appear after periods of strain or burnout — when we are too exhausted to keep performing and finally ask, What about me?

They show up as:

• wanting to travel

• taking a class

• learning photography again

• teaching yoga

• writing the book

• changing careers

• dating differently

• booking a solo holiday

They are not always asking for dramatic change.

Sometimes they simply ask:

Can you make a little more room for yourself?

4. Self‑Acceptance Is Replacing Self‑Improvement

For years, the focus was on fixing, improving, optimising.

But something is shifting.

People are moving toward:

• listening

• integrating

• accepting

• understanding

Not because they’ve given up, but because they’re tired of abandoning themselves.

I often see this in clients: the moment they stop striving to become someone “better,” they finally meet the person they already are.

And from that place, change becomes possible.

5. Relationships Change When We Change

As people become more authentic, they naturally seek:

• different conversations

• different communities

• different partners

• different work

Not because they are “ascending,” but because what once felt familiar no longer feels nourishing.

Tolerance for chaos decreases. The desire for reciprocity increases. Friendships shift. Work identities shift. Romantic expectations shift.

This is not selfishness. It’s alignment.

6. Society Encourages Fixed Identities — But Nature Doesn’t

We are told to choose one career, stay loyal, be consistent, don’t disappoint.

Yet nature is cyclical.

Seasons change. Tides move. Bodies age. Desires evolve.

Perhaps the distress many people feel is not because they are failing.

Perhaps it is because they are trying to remain fixed within systems that were never designed to accommodate human evolution.

7. Creativity Returns After Integration

When people stop fighting themselves, creativity resurfaces.

Not from force. But from space.

I’ve felt this myself:

• Substack and Patreon emerging

• Devon Diaries unfolding naturally

• Darker Diaries finding their voice

• Photography returning

• Essays weaving together psychology, class, travel, and lived experience

It’s not that new parts suddenly appear.

It’s that the conditions finally become safe enough for older parts to re‑emerge.

A Final Reflection

What stayed with me from listening to Mai Sol wasn’t the tarot cards. It was the recognition that many of us seem to be living through an identity shift.

There comes a point where the versions of ourselves built to survive no longer fit the lives we want to live.

The capable woman. The good employee. The devoted mother. The helper. The peacemaker. The one who always copes.

And while there is grief in laying these identities down, there is also relief.

Maybe we aren’t becoming someone new at all. Maybe we are simply allowing more of ourselves to come forward.

The creative parts. The playful parts. The sensitive parts. The curious parts. The adventurous parts. The parts that were too much or not enough for the rooms we once lived in.

Perhaps this next chapter isn’t about reinventing ourselves.

Perhaps it’s about finally giving ourselves permission to belong to ourselves.

 

if you would like to explore more then contact me for more info on melgbb555@hotmail.com

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